


its such a joke to hope that we could just be normal

by thiefAnarchist



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Sburb Session, Dialogue-Only, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, No Plot/Plotless, Suicidal Thoughts, discussion of intrusive thoughts, they talk abt stuff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:15:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27694711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thiefAnarchist/pseuds/thiefAnarchist
Summary: this isn't finished but I'm sick of looking at it
Relationships: Rose Lalonde & Dave Strider





	its such a joke to hope that we could just be normal

ROSE: So

DAVE: so

ROSE: How have your dreams been lately, Dave? We haven't had a conversation about that in a while.

DAVE: sure havent

DAVE: makes you wonder if there was a reason for that huh

DAVE: maybe it was a request from the stars themselves like hey lets make sure dave and rose dont have an long winded conversation about how my dreams are all one big gay metaphor

DAVE: “Oh, what was your big gay dream about, Dave?” oh i dont know there were gigantium dongs coming out of every orifice no big thing its normal for me yknow

ROSE: You're deflecting. 

DAVE: maybe so

ROSE: What happened, Dave?

ROSE: Was it another dream about your bro?

DAVE: sigh

DAVE: nothing gets past you huh lalonde

DAVE: yeah i had another dream about my bro

DAVE: it was pretty standard all things considered

DAVE: except instead of a bunch of cut up smuppets on the roof it was a bunch of my own corpses

ROSE: I see.

ROSE: What did they look like?

DAVE: what

DAVE: what does that have to do with anything

DAVE: are there specifics in your big book of dreams or are you just coming up with more psychological dream bullshit

ROSE: Neither, actually.

ROSE: Count it as a bit of my own curiosity.

ROSE: You don't have to tell me of course, but if you want you can.

DAVE: … ok sure whatever

DAVE: so there were like a bunch of corpses like a metric fuckton of dead daves

DAVE: and they all looked pretty mangled like in that five nights at freddys mangle way 

DAVE: some were decapitated some were on their way there and others just had a bunch of stab wounds and broken bones

ROSE: Hm.

DAVE: what do you mean hm

DAVE: come on dont leave me hanging with a villager sound as a response

ROSE: I’m just putting my thoughts together.

ROSE: Okay.

ROSE: Maybe all the corpses represent what you felt your bro was going to do to you eventually during your childhood?

DAVE: dammit rose i thought you werent going to do this dream analysis shit

ROSE: I never said I wouldn’t do the dream analysis shit. And you’re deflecting again.

DAVE: ugh

DAVE: idk sure maybe

DAVE: its just that like

DAVE: i dunno nevermind i dont know what im saying

ROSE: It seems like you already have a thought put together Dave. I won’t force you to share it but sharing might make you feel better.

DAVE: its just that

DAVE: there was some like sick satisfaction at seeing all my corpses there

DAVE: i dont even know where it came from it just just a bunch of relief and a bunch of nothing in one shitty feeling

ROSE: …

DAVE: what

ROSE: Dave, have you ever thought about suicide?

DAVE: what no

DAVE: me killing myself wouldnt fix anything itll just make shit worse for everyone else

ROSE: I know that. I’m just asking if you have considered it before. And judging by your answer it seems that you have.

DAVE: fuck

DAVE: ok yeah ive thought about it before

DAVE: but its just a brief thing of like ‘hey what if i just jumped off the roof of my apartment complex lol’ kinda thing

DAVE: as i was like standing right there on the roof

ROSE: An intrusive thought.

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: do you have those sometimes

ROSE: ...yes. 

DAVE: what are they about

ROSE: What about yours Dave?

DAVE: ha look whos deflecting now

ROSE: Maybe I am or maybe I’m worried for my brother’s mental health.

DAVE: sounds like both

ROSE: It could be both.

DAVE: idk mine are pretty normal i guess

DAVE: like wanting to jump off the roof or wanting to impale myself with one of bros shitty katanas just to see how it feels

DAVE: or like this one time when i was on the subways when i went to go visit you there was this lady standing really close to the rails and i had a sudden urge to just push her onto the tracks

DAVE: pretty fucked up huh

ROSE: No, not really.

ROSE: These thoughts don’t represent who you are, Dave.

ROSE: And like I said, I’ve had similar thoughts myself.

DAVE: mind telling me

ROSE: They’re kind of similar to yours.

ROSE: I’ve thought about jumping off the railing in my house, or drowning myself in one of the waterways.

ROSE: I often have thoughts of wanting to steal my mothers liquor and drink it until my brain feels numb and THEN drowning myself in the waterways.

DAVE: huh

DAVE: and youre just like ok with it?? you dont feel bad about it??

ROSE: Oh no I definitely feel bad. It’s impossible to not feel bad when thinking of ways to kill yourself.

ROSE: I just got used to them i suppose.

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: same kinda

DAVE: i guess im on the roof so often that the thought of maybe i should jump just lost its shock factor

ROSE: You still go on the roof? Why?

DAVE: i think to just remember he isnt there anymore

DAVE: that he cant hurt me

ROSE: But you still think of suicide whenever you go up there?

DAVE: … a little

ROSE: Dave.

ROSE: For the sake of yourself, please stop going on the roof. It doesn’t take much for an intrusive thought to become a reality.

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: yeah ok ill

DAVE: try i guess

DAVE: ok can we stop talking about this

DAVE: cant we just talk about your dreams for once

ROSE: We certainly could, I just never saw why you would want to.

DAVE: well maybe i just care about my sister

DAVE: see i threw that one back at cha

ROSE: Indeed you have my dear brother.

DAVE: ew

ROSE: Yeah.

ROSE: Well my dreams are quite average.

ROSE: Being unprepared for something, flying, being chased by something unknown.

ROSE: But I do have a dream that keeps coming up every now and then ever since I was a kid.

ROSE: I would be in an abandoned hospital just walking through endless corridors.

ROSE: There was forgotten equipment everywhere.

ROSE: At one point I decide to open a fridge sitting near the next door.

ROSE: It is completely empty save for one mostly decomposed human skull. 

DAVE: jesus fucking christ

ROSE: But for some reason I decide to hold the skull.

ROSE: Then it starts to levitate.

DAVE: what the fuck??

ROSE: The skull started trembling, more bone growing from it, elongating the mouth and spreading apart the eyes.

ROSE: At that point the skull had started to grow horns, and a thin vertebrae to use as a neck. 

DAVE: oh hell no

ROSE: It's rude to interrupt, Dave.

ROSE: As I was saying, the skull started to demon less human and more goat like with each passing second.

ROSE: Just as the skull was almost fully a goat skull, I wake up.

DAVE: god what the fuck

DAVE: and i thought my dreams were bad

ROSE: No they certainly are.

ROSE: They're just different levels of bad.

DAVE: i guess

DAVE: so like what does it mean

ROSE: What does what mean?

DAVE: your spooky demon head dream

ROSE: ...I don't know. 

ROSE: I've never really thought about it before.

DAVE: ok i know thats bullshit you analyze fuckin everything

DAVE: and youve been having this dream since you were a kid

DAVE: you mustve done some dream searching or whatever

ROSE: Fine.

ROSE: From what I've gathered, dreams of hospitals represent fear of illness, or an illness already inside of you that you can't get rid off.

ROSE: And a goat head represents the need of healing, and/or a dark omen.

ROSE: It almost makes too much sense when it comes to me.

DAVE: huh

DAVE: so basically your demon dream was just saying that your scared of a sickness you cant stop and that you need to heal

DAVE: damn thats deep

DAVE: if you try hard enough you can make that an indie song

ROSE: Please, don't.

DAVE: why

DAVE: afraid of my sick beats lalonde?

ROSE: Yes, actually.

ROSE: I'm afraid that your beats will be so sick that I enter an unescapable coma.

DAVE: damn

DAVE: well sucks to be you lalonde im already working on the drafts as we speak

ROSE: What a shame for me.

DAVE: yeah

ROSE: Yeah.

DAVE:...

ROSE:...

ROSE:...Are you glad that your bro is gone?

DAVE: i mean 

DAVE: im not not sad that hes gone

DAVE: i mostly just dont know what to do with myself

DAVE: like the random routine of strifing kept me sane

DAVE: but now that thats gone that HES gone

DAVE: it makes me feel like im losing my mind 

DAVE: but it also feels like i can finally breathe

ROSE: I'm sorry, Dave.

DAVE: for what??

ROSE: For not being more aware of your suffering.

ROSE: I've known you for years, and yet I never took much note of what was happening behind closed doors.

DAVE: its really no big thing

DAVE: ive dealt with it all yknow even tho it hurt like a motherfuck

DAVE: just cuz i have scars to show what he did doesnt mean weve gotta feel bad about them

ROSE: I understand that you're trying to make me feel better but you really are doing a pisspoor job of doing that.

DAVE: sorry

ROSE: It's fine.

DAVE: so hows your mom been

ROSE: She's technically your mom too remember?

DAVE: god dont remind me

ROSE: Our mother has been fine, for her definition of the word.

ROSE: Meaning she's completely fucking wasted on the couch right now.

DAVE: shit man

DAVE: is she somewhere comfortable at least

ROSE: By how deeply she's snoring I'd say she is.

ROSE: Just wish she would pass out in her room so I wouldn't have to force myself to be in my room more that I usually do.

**Author's Note:**

> first post on here yeehaw  
> i just wanted them to talk about dreams with some projection thrown in there


End file.
